The 3 Rooms (Counselling)

 


I decided that I wanted to write an important post from Nov. 27, 2025 counselling.

I had been struggling with the fear and anxiety that’s in my body and mind, as it had been stronger.  It’s so frustrating as I seem to get it more oddly enough on Tuesdays and Thursdays.  It’s not like I don’t get it other times, as it’s pretty constant the struggle, but some days are just too much.

So when I talking to my Counsellor she asked me to describe it.  At first I wasn’t sure what that would look like.  She said it could be an object, or a room or anything that scares me.

So I thought it through and at my worst I saw it as a Black Spikey Dungeon and it keeps getting close and closer where it could almost hurt or even kill me, and it feels like I am suffocating and can’t breathe as I’m so scared of having the spikes over take me.

My counsellor then said are there times when the fear and anxiety are a little better, and what would that look like.

I said that it was a White Room with a window and that there is a light from the window that shines through and though the light is trying to help – I can only relax a bit and when I can’t stop the anxiety then I give into my pain as the light is too bright – so I want to give into the blackness instead so that I can curl up and cry.

Then my counsellor asked if there was a room that I felt free.  I said that I don’t get there that often, but I imagined a Red room where my hubby and Elohim (God) are.  Red is one of my favourite colours, besides Black, which I also like.

Anyways in this Red Room it’s where I find love and joy like I never have had before, where there is no pain, and I can be genuinely happy as I can feel the love of Elohim and my hubby and I can give it back to them and others too.  It’s where I can feel His Shalom (Peace).

I know getting to the Red Room seems impossible, but it’s a good way to imagine seeing Freedom & Liberation there waiting for me to somehow let go of all my Fears and Anxiety and embrace Elohim’s Love instead.

My counsellor said I should say to myself when the Black Spikes of Fear becomes stronger to

Say NO!!! STOP & BACK OFF!!!  And to let the Fighter "Crystal Side" of me to Stand up with me Against that Intense Fear I feel - to Show that I can be Brave and Believe I DON'T DESERVE PAIN!!!

I can see that the Black Spikey Dungeon is a place I put myself in because a part of me still thinks I Deserve Pain, and it wants to beat me down and push the Black Spikes into me.  Though my Crystal/Angry side is a Fighter and wants to yell at me to get better – my counsellor talked to her and saw that she’s also a scared little girl and if we fought the fear together – it can help us feel less alone.

This is a new thought of going against my fears and learn how to fight for freedom with not only my Fighter/Crystal side but let Elohim work in me and work through my fears and then going through the White Room and then even someday the Red Room where I can be safe.

I know it’s so hard to fight something that’s so big it seems impossible to keep going, but that’s when Elohim can help you, and it helps when you bring along the fighter side of yourself too, so you know you aren’t alone in this crazy difficult mental battle.  That you are so very loved and wanted.  To Remember always to breathe and never give up.

Patricia <3   :)

 

Isaiah 41:13    For I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand
and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you.

 

Here’s a song about how thanking the Lord for everything, especially for when He saved us when we were weak that He is there for us.

 

“This Is How I Thank The Lord” (Acoustic Cover) by Hillside Recording

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Bhwg5Eo_5I&list=PLcrGhhNZPRAgU8pdbqqrmr1yUslJ0jrx7&index=10

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